


Sweet, Sugar, Candy Man

by sperrywink



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Candy, Fluff, M/M, Shoplifting, Star Trek References
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-31
Updated: 2016-12-31
Packaged: 2018-09-13 18:32:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9136438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sperrywink/pseuds/sperrywink
Summary: Shoplifting always makes Leonard feel better. This time it definitely leads to good things.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dungeonmarm](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dungeonmarm/gifts).



> Happy New Year, Dungeonmarm!!

Len left the theater fuming. He couldn’t believe they had ended the movie that way just to have their Kirk/Spock moment. They had totally ignored Bones, and Spock didn’t even call for medical care for Jim at the end! Even if he thought he was going to die, he should have let Bones decide that, not just sit there being a lump on a log.

Harrumph.

Not that Len was overly invested in Jim/Bones or anything. He had more important things to do like plan his next heist. He certainly didn’t fantasize about the original TV series captain Kirk and grouchy Bones getting it on when he was growing up. He also certainly didn’t model some of his behavior on Kirk. And he certainly didn’t see all the alternate universe Star Trek movies on opening night because he thought Chris Pine was hot, particularly when paired with Karl Urban. That would have been foolish, and Len was anything but.

Still feeling out of sorts, (for no particular reason, okay, Lisa?) Len entered the drug store next to the theater and began shoplifting candy bars. What can he say? Five-fingering things made him feel better, and this was a crappy day.

Which was going fine, until he turned to leave and The Flash was gaping at him from the end of the aisle. Len knew Barry wouldn’t have been able to see anything with Len’s back in the way, also conveniently blocking him from the security cameras, but he also knew Barry suspected the worst of him _always_. Which considering he was up to no good about 90% of the time, was probably a good suspicion, but that didn’t help him prevaricate now.

Barry stalked up to him and said, “I can’t believe you!”

“Hello, Barry, nice to see you too.”

Barry huffed exasperatedly, and Len grinned. Annoying Barry was even better than shoplifting. Getting to do both? Priceless. He slipped a Snickers bar into his parka right under Barry’s nose just for fun.

“Are you casing the jewelry shop across the street? In broad daylight?”

Len looked out the window. Hmm. There was a convenient jewelry store viewable just outside. He said, “Yes, yes, I am. What are you going to do about it?” Somehow an Almond Joy found its way next to the Snickers.

Barry started a diatribe about his lack of moral fiber or whatever. It was punctuated with jabs of Barry’s pointy index finger, and asides into how Barry couldn’t believe the gall of Len. Len enjoyed it immensely, particularly as he could lift a Kit Kat _and_ a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup. He liked the Big Cup ones. He was stealing more candy than he had planned, but his mood was markedly better. And hey, Barry was blocking the security camera and front cashiers, so why not.

Unfortunately, Barry looked down, just as Len’s hand was settling in his parka pocket with a Three Musketeers, and his eyes widened. He hissed, “Are you shoplifting? Really? Isn’t there anything beneath you?”

Len smirked his best smirk. “Not really.”

And then Barry, who apparently wasn’t shy, began wrestling Len’s hand out of his pocket and trying to slip his other hand up the inside of the parka to maybe tip the candy out? Len wasn’t sure, but it felt like Barry had eight hands. Not wanting to lose his ill-gotten gains, Len resisted of course. As they wrestled, an older woman came around the corner into the aisle. She had a cane and her own puffy, red coat. She smiled delightedly at them as they froze in shock.

She said, “Aww, it’s so nice to see a young couple like yourselves showing your love freely. In my day, me and my Martha had to hide ours.”

As Barry opened his mouth to no doubt disavow all romantic feelings, Len took tight hold of Barry’s hand, and held up their joined hands as proof to Martha’s sweetheart. This also conveniently got Barry’s hand out of his pocket. Talking over Barry’s inarticulate protests, he said, “Thank you, mam. I remember when it was ill-advised also. Nice to see the world changing for the better for once, am I right?”

She smiled at him, her eyes twinkling, and Len smiled back as Barry gaped at him. Len continued with, “Young kids just don’t understand.”

“Well, that’s what we fought for, after all,” she replied. “For them to have that luxury.”

She gave one final wave, and picked up her own Reese’s Peanut Butter Big Cup, and headed towards the front of the store. Len nodded at her good taste and in queer solidarity.

Len said, “Come along, darling, we can finish our discussion in the car,” just to see Barry’s expression at the endearment. Plus this way, he could drag Barry out of the store, which he did, and thus make off with the goods, which he also did. With one last smirk, Len let Barry’s arm go and headed towards the theater parking lot. 

He began unwrapping his Reese’s Peanut Butter Big Cup as he walked. 

Barry yelled, “Hey! We’re not done here!”

Len threw one hand up in a ‘whatever’ gesture over his shoulder, but then Barry was whirling him around, as Len should have expected and mostly did. “You can’t just go around stealing whatever you want!”

Raising his eyebrows, Len took a leisurely bite of his Reese’s Peanut Butter Big Cup and chewed slowly. Once he swallowed, he said, “It seems like I can.”

Barry was gritting his teeth. “You’re so shameless! And you let that poor woman think you were gay! How could you?”

Barry seemed more upset about that than the shoplifted candy, and Len tilted his head to the side. Maybe that had struck a nerve with Barry? This could be golden. “Who says I’m not? Or bi at least?”

“Stop being ridiculous! Can you even stop lying for one second?” He hit Len with his pointy finger again, and started stuttering out, “You’re… you’re… queer-baiting, is what you’re doing! And it’s not nice!”

Len swooped closer and wrapped one arm around Barry’s waist, maneuvering in such a way that Barry was off-balance and depending on Len’s arm to stay upright. He gaped at Len. Len rubbed his cold nose along Barry’s cheek as he said, “First of all, your protests beg the question of just whom it is I’m baiting that’s queer. Second of all, I’m never all bark. I always bite.”

And just because he apparently could, he kissed Barry, who eeped.

Despite his suspicions that Barry was gay, bi, or questioning, and despite the practically engraved invitation to kiss him, Len still expected Barry to sock him one. 

Barry didn’t. He kissed back ardently, wrapping his arms around Len’s shoulders. It was delightful.

He didn’t know how long they were going at it in the parking lot of the drug store, but a cheerful, “You get him, young man,” brought Len out of his aroused haze, and he waved at Martha’s sweetheart in good-bye as she got in her car across the lot.

Once his gaze returned to Barry’s flushed face, he smirked. Barry hit his shoulder, but looked pleased. Liking where this was going, imagining nakedness and a mussed bed in his mind, Len slowly pulled Barry back upright, and settled him back on his feet.

Barry shuffled said feet and looked forlorn. Len rolled his eyes and held out his hand, “Well, you coming or what? I believe there is some biting I promised to do.”

Barry face broke into a goofy grin, the goober, and he rushed to take Len’s hand as Len led him to his car. Barry said, “This doesn’t mean I will let you rob that jewelry store or anywhere else for that matter.”

Len smiled as guilelessly as he could. It probably wasn’t very convincing, since Barry snorted at him, but Len just smiled wider and asked, “Want a Three Musketeers bar?”

Barry hit his arm again, but took the pilfered candy bar as his stomach rumbled. Len was definitely feeling better now, and he expected to feel downright fantastic as soon as he could get Barry in bed.

What a great day.


End file.
